Each year as the leaves start to change color and fall in preparation of the cold winter ahead I am struck by their beauty. Suddenly I’m living in a world full of colors that weren’t there before – welcoming in the cool Autumn breeze as the seasons change once more. October has always been my favorite month, and now it holds this dramatic mix of beauty and sorrow. You should be three now – each Fall reminds me of your birthday and leads me to wondering about how different my life would be if you were here. If I’d been able to hold you in my arms, instead of losing you red like the falling leaves. Continue reading
Disclaimer: This story contains some graphic descriptions of my experience with miscarriage.
Three years ago today I was sitting in the emergency room – waiting anxiously – not knowing if the child in my womb was alive or dead. Just waiting – while a child died inside of me. The waiting seemed like it took forever – my emergency, did not look like an emergency. When all the while – my emergency was death. Continue reading