Rise…

It’s a simple word, but it contains a lot of meaning. It sounds inspiring…encouraging…empowering even.

Yet, it is so hard to rise above the struggle, to move past what’s bothering you…to “overcome” or “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” or “get over it” or “suck it up”.

All you want to do is rise, but the ability to do so just escapes you. The will to keep pushing, keep fighting, keep believing wanes. The anxiety over just getting out of bed can seem insurmountable.

Why is it so difficult to rise? Why is it so difficult to overcome? Why is it so easy to struggle? To fall time and time again. To falter even with the best intentions…to fail in spite of how badly you want to succeed.

Why is it so difficult to rise? To want so badly to move on and get “unstuck” yet to feel like you remain in the same cycle over and over again. Why does it feel like the moment you make a great gain there’s another wave of fear and anxiety to push you right back down?

Why is the fear so strong? How does it appear and grip so quickly…so easily…so intensely? Why is it so hard to face and push past?

The rise isn’t immediate or easy. It’s a slow, steady climb. It annoys, it frustrates, it teases. At times it feels like you’re running…at times it feels like your losing your grip and falling.

Yet still…you rise…

Why?

Love. Fear. Responsibility. Determination. Encouragement. Hope.

Something wills you to rise. A smile, a gentle touch, a beautiful reminder, a loving encouragement, a surprise.

And while the fear never dissipates…never stops assaulting you…neither does the resolve…to keep attempting to rise…

This is fatherhood…